Happily Ever After

~W~


What is perfect anyway right? I think if we try to make ourselves believe that we need to be perfect that we'll always fall short. I know without a doubt my husband and I will still argue. We did a bit last night. It was nothing major. I said something about the situation and he sounded a bit defensive which let me tell you just turns on an instant switch in my brain that says "How dare he?" Well I come down off that pedestal after awhile and realize it's only human nature to feel defensive. We defend our own actions especially if they are bad. He knows what he did was wrong, for whatever reason it was done. Dwelling on the why of it has just plagued me but I do try to give myself time to just not think about it. I do it for me and no one else. I cannot possibly live thinking of it all day long. It tortures me. It took me awhile to let myself believe it was ok to not think of it for awhile. It's really difficult. I believe we do have a very good relationship. He quickly apologized for being defensive and I admit I was still kind of steamed. I love him more than life though. I know he is very confused by it all as well.

I don't think it's healthy to say you have the perfect relationship because that's when you stop getting better. You have achieved all there is. Well I know for a fact I have so much more to get from my relationship and to give. I have always imagined growing old with this man. I'll love every single wrinkle, as long as I am with him.

~W~



I know the movie Fireproof has a Christian sort of theme. I think this movie can apply to ANYONE having marriage difficulty. Not just Christians. I don't want to offend anyone who believes or does not believe. I just think the whole message it sends is very important. It says basically to give up things that you are loving more than your spouse. Anything that you put BEFORE your spouse is wrong. You should love, honor and cherish them as you vowed on your wedding day. If my husband wants to spend time with me, and I tell him I'd rather hang out with my friends, fine....that would hurt but ok. But what if I did that every time? What if I was always online, chatting it up and never spending time with him? Or what if he was always going out with his friends and not spending time with me? That life leads to divorce. I am telling you, you lose your relationship. It slowly fades away and you start to forget that it was ever there. I think you can take the message from Fireproof as a Christian or not, or even another faith and apply it to your marriage. I loved it. It made me cry...a lot. I love my husband and I do know I was not perfect. I made a whole lot of mistakes and allowed myself to drift away from my husband. I never stopped loving him for one day. Not for one second. I am so ready to spend forever with him.

~W~

Yes this is a bit off topic, but seriously it bothers the hubby and I to a great degree some of the ads that come through. Most are okay because they talk about trusting again after an affair or making it through such a horrible situation. The occasional ad has come through though, actually advertising for affairs. I have seen a few that ask if you are looking and you supposedly click their ad to find it. I wish I had more control over that because I obviously do not want that on my page. I think the google bots just scan the site for key words though. So, what can I do?

On a different note my husband and I have been very close the past few days. Well we are always close these days. Our relationship has changed so much and for the better. I finally have the relationship I have always dreamed of having. I have the man I always knew I wanted but finally the loving relationship and not just being content. It took us both and a bit of love, romance and appreciation to get there. See, you can't take your spouse for granted. You can't take them for granted ever. If you've been together 1 year or 20 years you need to always show them that you appreciate them and love them. Walk up to them and out of the blue grab their face and kiss them full on. I love that by the way. Just love it and I try to do it too. There is so much more passion than there used to be. My problem was always me being 100% mommy and not giving enough to my husband. My personal feeling is I didn't have a lot of desire because there was zero romance. I am so happy to have that back now. I have it now more than I ever have. I hate saying it too because we did absolutely have a wonderful relationship before. I have always loved him and we were always so close. We drifted apart the moment our first child was born. My life became taking care of kids. His was working, working and more working. If you see yourself in this rut? My suggestion is to change it NOW...before it's too late.